Lent, Giving Up Excuses

I'm not very good at Lent.  When I was in High School I just thought it was something Catholics did and then all of a sudden my friends ate bad fish on Fridays and didn't drink pop until Easter.  This totally clashed with my steak-laden Coca-Cola parties I had on Friday nights.  Maybe that didn't really happen, but still, I thought they were really harshing my gig, man.

Later in life I learned more about the idea of giving up something that detracts from your relationship with Christ and beyond that the absence of that thing being filled by the preparation for Easter.  There is a lot more to Lent than that, but that is another blog post.  One I may write, one I may just have in my head, or one my husband will compose beautifully in a conversation in the Bible study he is leading about Lent based on N.T. Wright's book, Lent for Everyone.

Still, most years I simply told people I was giving up dieting for Lent.  That was pretty much a joke because I haven't been on a serious diet since I was seriously crazy about dieting (read: not eating) and have decided that Oreos are better than not-Oreos any day.  I didn't see the point in giving up pop or candy, which in itself would probably be a good diet for me to be on, it seemed frivolous.  When I got older I honestly knew people who would go to midnight mass on Easter morning and then go out for a beer because they gave up alcohol for Lent.  Their giving up of something was not born out of a desire to grow closer to God or purify themselves in anyway but out of a guilt-ridden sense of obligation and tradition.  So again, there wasn't much attractiveness to me in that.

Last year I tried to give up cussing (sorry mom) particularly while driving.  I didn't succeed, nor did I tell anyone I was trying to give that up for Lent so when I did slip, or maybe intentionally profane the life of every person in the greater Seattle area who can't figure out what turn signals are for, then I wasn't kept accountable to anyone except myself.  And goodness knows, I can talk my way out of just about any guilt at all, except of course the speeding ticket I got yesterday for going 53 in a 35 because I was rushing and could not in good conscience cry my way out of that one with four kids in the car.

So this year, I'm going to do my best to give up my ability to talk my way out of guilt.  I, Alissa Kaye Hormann, am giving up excuses for Lent and I am telling you all about it so I am accountable to someone.  (I say you all in some sense that there are many of you reading this, I will keep up that thought because if it isn't true I still am just talking to myself)

I was thinking about this today as I was watching an amazing online seminar on restarting your photography business by photographer extraordinaire Jasmine Star.  She is the kind of business saavy, photographic powerhouse that every wedding photographer dreams of being.  Something she kept on reminding everyone who was watching was that you can always make excuses for why you don't get things done but then you just have excuses and nothing to show for them.

That was a really hard thing for me to come to grips with because I was watching it while trying to nurse and spend time with a sick little boy who I love more than anything and he is generally my "best excuse" as to why I don't get things done.  Then I realized something, he is not an excuse, he is a reason.

There is a difference between making an excuse and having a reason, truth be told I've been making enough excuses lately that I started to blur the lines between my reasons and my excuses.  Holding my son when he is sick is not some made up "dog ate my homework" backpedaling, it is a reason and a darn good one at that for why I am not typing this blog post until now.  Spending the night sharing wine and dreams with my husband is not an excuse it is an excellent reason.  So often I lump spending time with valuable people in my life in the same category as cruising Craigslist for someone who will cut my hair for free because I haven't book enough photography clients to pay my girl $45 for a hair cut.  My endless searching for something I don't need is not the same as him:

Or him:

Or them:

Or this:

Or these:

These people, places and things are good reasons to take time away from "productivity."  I will choose my son's smile and my husband's laughter over finishing a blog post or email any day.  But at the same time I realize that giving up making excuses is a resolution to tell myself the truth more often.  It's freeing myself up to be honest about why I am avoiding a specific project or email or text message.  I am choosing to be truthful and actually say, "I am not doing this because I don't want to."  It doesn't mean I'm going to immediately change my attitude but it will probably shine a new light on my choice to stay stagnant or move forward.

So this was maybe a little deep, and not quite as lighthearted as previous posts, so because I like to break tension with jokes, here are some Lent memes to laugh at.